Why are people so cruel? Why do good people become cruel?
Daily in our life penetrates a continuous negativeof different scales. The media helpfully inform who killed whom, robbed, shot down. Constantly different sources of information bring to our attention information about new cataclysms, political turmoil. A positive, in comparison with the number of negative news, is negligible. There is an impression that there is absolutely no good and good in the world. Unfortunately, this flow so "clogged" the head that today no one even thinks about why people are so cruel? How to change this? And is modern humanity so soulless?
Main reasons
Why are there so many cruel people? The answer to this question should be sought in the causes of the onset of aggression. It should be noted that the manifestations of cruelty are many. At the same time, it is not difficult to identify it. A person who inflicts pain on others, making them suffer, whether morally or physically, fully aware of this and striving to cause harm, is cruel.
Psychologists distinguish three reasons why people are violent:
- Dissatisfaction with life. Persons who are dissatisfied with their destiny, ratheroften subjected to stress, depression. These emotions overwhelm their soul so much that they are ready to break free at any moment. That is why all negatives are often poured out by mothers to children. Some people under the influence of anger break down branches of trees, beat animals. This state of mind is quite dangerous, because it threatens the owner with the emergence of neuroses, mental disorders. In addition to all this, a permanent negative seriously shortens life expectancy, leads to the development of heart disease or skin problems.
- Indifference. Very often it is this that gives rise to an unjustifiedcruelty. Some people do not even try to understand how much pain can cause their actions, and sometimes words. They do not think how much they can hurt another. At the same time, a weak creature becomes the object of their cruelty, which can not show emotions and explain what pain it caused.
- Suppressed emotions. Sometimes people manifest aggression "on the side". This behavior is typical of those who in everyday life are forced to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, impulses. Most often characterized by such cruelty in the grown up children (especially boys), who grew up in the family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are forced to obey the orders of the chief without question, without being able to reveal their will, in some circumstances can show extreme cruel ruthlessness.
Historical cruelty
The older generation likes to wonder - why somany cruel people appeared? Here before all were kinder. Listening to their complaint, you involuntarily agree. You just need to open a newspaper or watch the news.
Previously, people were kinder. It is worth pondering. And earlier - this is when? Millennia ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well these people can by and large just somehow justify. They were primitive. And they did not know about the humane attitude towards their neighbor. And perhaps, were those who lived in the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? Many people were imprisoned through denunciations. How many such "good people" sincerely tried to present a "gift" to their neighbor!
Why does it feel like todaymany cruel people? Of course, the media contributed. In the era of democracy, they pay more attention to manifestations of cruelty. It should be noted that the level of humanity in humanity has increased, so aggression is so striking.
Relations with relatives
All people tend to show cruelty. In some, this happens very rarely. Others quite often show aggression. Anyone can commit a brutal act, and quite often such outbursts happen to really kind people. Unfortunately, all the negative spills out on the very nearest and dearest. On those who really love and are very dear. Why are people so cruel? What makes them "tear off" anger at their relatives, and with others to restrain impulses of anger? Why can not I control my behavior with my close people?
Yes, because the family will not go anywhere. Communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many reasons: the desire to place the interlocutor to oneself, and the fear of losing an interesting friend. In the case of the head, incontinence may threaten to be dismissed. But if you get into the circle of relatives, especially in a bad mood, a person can make even one word out of himself. Then the scandal flares up in a completely empty place. Of course, this is fundamentally wrong, but the accumulated negative requires a discharge. That's why it pours out on the very relatives and friends. They, even if much insult them and quarrel with them, are so fond of being forgiven anyway.
The root of evil
The feeling of anger is given by nature. It is necessary to mobilize all forces to fight at dangerous moments. But how it will be used by a person depends on the norms of morality, vaccinated even in childhood. If the parents show aggression towards the child, this will necessarily happen. Relationships between children and fathers, based on fear, are likely to be adopted by the adolescent in communicating with peers. It is in the family that the root of evil should be sought. Such upbringing clearly explains why people become violent.
Although in this situation the child canto develop and another model of behavior: he decides that it is bad and in everything to blame. Such a teenager becomes a victim of peer abuse. Often, he does not even look for methods of protection, believing that he deserved this.
Sometimes the cause of aggression may not beviolence, but a hyperope. This method of education puts a sense of permissiveness into the child's subconscious. The teenager thinks himself the most important and demands unquestioning obedience. Unfortunately, a person who has not been taught by parents to respect others, will not find this wisdom anywhere else. He will not even notice how humiliating.
Instability in society
The indirect cause of cruelty isincreasing anxiety. Social inequality, instability creates a sense of discomfort. From the TV screens people see again cruelty. A person whose psyche is formed, able to distinguish grain from husk, he will not accept aggression as a call to activity. The child will absorb the screen scenes of violence, like a sponge. And can perceive all this as a kind of school of life. It is important to realize how much the child's psyche hurts such a television, and the answer to the question: "Why did people become cruel?" instantaneously becomes.
Feeling of non-acceptance
Especially it is developed in adolescence. However, many adults endure such feelings in adulthood. Quite often it is possible to observe a picture when the kid loudly exclaims in the street and pokes a finger in the person with a different skin color or having a physical defect.
Adults react differently. At a subconscious level, they experience a sense of danger. Immediately there is a desire to self-destruct. But in some it manifests itself in cruelty and violence. It is this feeling that sometimes makes teenagers scoff at peers that are different from them. Why are people so cruel? Again, imparted skills of tolerance and respect in the family will not allow a teenager or an adult person to behave this way.
How to defend the victim
Psychologists say that in the team it is easy enough to determine which people are cruel and who is a "lamb". Therefore, the victim of aggression is advised to identify on the following grounds:
- low self-esteem;
- diffidence;
- full acceptance of the opinion that troubles are deserved.
You should begin with the realization of your "I". Any person has a number of advantages and disadvantages. It is as it is. And nobody has the right to hurt him. Only by fully accepting this truth can we move further along the path of raising self-esteem, developing a sense of success. The child in this awareness can help parents. For an adult, since the behavior pattern has taken root, it is better to take the help of a professional psychologist.
As a rule, hobby helps a new business. You can even enroll in the martial arts section.
It is very important to think over the reaction to the offender. He will take you quite differently if the answer is different from his expectations. In some cases, a sense of humor helps. Try not to succumb to irritation and send a complex conflict into the mainstream of a joke. At the same time learn to perceive less sharply unpleasant situations.
How to deal with their own aggression?
The reasons described above give an idea of why good people become cruel. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil inwardly?
Perfectly clean the negative of physical activity. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your emotions and body. Psychologists often recommend breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both your body and spirit.
Find a safe way out for the accumulatednegativity. Pour out your emotions with a cry. Only not on relatives and on the colleague. Shout where it's needed. For example, become an ardent football fan or attend rock concerts.
By the way, psychologists recommend this method: get up near the railway in the evening. When the train passes, shout that there is urine, as loud as you can. The noise of the wheels will muffle any sound. No one will hear you, and the body will receive the necessary discharge.
Conclusion
Remember that with that sense of cruelty thatarises within you, you can only cope. And this is entirely within your power. If you want to find the answer to the question "why people are so cruel," start with yourself. Analyze your behavior. Get rid of the poisoning feelings, because sooner or later it threatens to degenerate into a severe depression.
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